True love was here, and I was standing still
Awaiting the salvation, the security, the time
But I was standing still, beneath
the plane of his horizon
So he could not see me – - and the
lesser infatuations baited my warranted reward
I shied into the darkness. My silence. My strength.
——————-
The deceiver came, and I limped from the shadows
and I dove into his
Opening my mouth, my body, my need
for a filler of the void
To and fro, victory and defeat, rejection and desire, confusion and despair
Lulled into his fantasy until he loosened the strings
I slipped away, mostly unscaved.
Thank God the wounds heal, thank God for time.
——————–
The betrayer came and I ran to him
Because I could give my all, without my masks, my body, my weakness.
I could open my mouth, without condemnation
I could be myself, frailties and all
Until the tempest came, and he could brave the storm
Calm it, without my vessel being torn to pieces
But he stepped aside and I was swallowed in its ferocity
My boundaries high. He can’t get in. He can’t get in.
———————-
The tempter came and I wearily inched into his embrace,
while my emotions ran effortlessly to his allure.
Willing to give my lust, my darkness, my all… so I could lose it all.
He would give me my own world,
to escape my outer-existence that was bludgeoning me
beyond recognition – I was losing myself
to the drawn out game. Until he stopped my slow descent
before I hit the floor.
——————
Then true love appeared – he was standing still,
patiently waiting for me to understand
That love isn’t a race, a chase – ecstasy or a fascination.
But in my haste, I couldn’t see
His gaze rested on me all along: my source
my silent strength.
From my weakness, he lifted me
From my blindness, he led me
until we could sit comfortably staring into the horizon
and my soul could finally rest -
the way true stillness should be.
© 2010, Caela Strong. All rights reserved.
{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
masterful. this captures you and takes you with each verse to the next. i scrolled down and saw how long it was but i never stopped reading. this is awesome.
Thank you! I am glad the length didn’t dissuade you… that’s always a concern of mine.
a vivid dance with deception into the divine
Simply a perfect poem about who we think feels so right to confide and trust. They were there all along and we go out looking for other people places and things. then how true love is still there when we are tired of all the searching. Jus Breautiful!
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